Sunday, July 29, 2012

Where You Been?

Ok, I guess the right question is "Where have *I* been?" Whatever...

Well, sorry for not writing an update in so long, but I've yet to master how to write with "Stop That" hanging off my jowels or my ears or biting my legs. He's got the sharpest teeth that I have scabs all over my neck and ears to prove just what I've been up to these past few weeks. He's lucky he's cute, otherwise I wouldn't tolerate this lil devil dawg using me as a teething ring.
We went bye-bye's to Maryland and saw my friends Koho and Bear. While the beans were there, I swear they had a lapse in mental judgement and ended up bringing home this lil thing....

HEY! You don't live here?! Who the heck are you and when do you go home?

That is Pippa. The beans said she was gonna be here a few days til her real momma came and got her. We did have fun and it was kinda nice that Bauer and Pippa could use each other as a teething ring, instead of me. They had the same birthday, so I think that makes them like brudda and sista, but they had different mommy and daddies, so maybe they are just cousins, cuz they sure played ALOT!

And snuggled alot too...

Pippa finally went home to her momma and I thought life would calm down. But, nope, I want that lil thing back cuz I'm still STOP THAT's chew toy.

*shaking my head*

So, I have to do what I can to tire him out.

I taught him to play in the tunnel.

I tried to teach him how to swim.

We played Hide N Seek.

I gave him chores to do, like doin the dishes.

Or the laundry.

We played "I'm gonna git you!"

Taught him how to relax.

Showed him where the bunnies live.

We played keep away!

Taught him how to do the back scootch.


Convinced him to check it out and see if the grass was really greener on the other side.

Taught him how to watch TV.

Even showed him where all the goodies are kept.

WHEW!! All that wore me out! But do you think it stopped him from using me as a chew toy?


Fortunately for him, he does still have his moments of being quiet (and cute). There aren't many, but I do use em to my advantage and try to keep up with my sleep.

Oh, and if you're wondering what happened to his ears....The Beans gave him pigtails!! HaHaHa!! Sissy LaLa in the making, I'm tellin ya! They put tape on them cuz his ears fly away and they say it will help to keep them flat. I think it makes him look girly!

I thought it was hysterical! That is, til they thought I'd look cute with pigtails too!

So in the past few weeks, he's gotten big! Maybe one day he'll stop growing and stop trying to eat me!

He still pees in the house tho. I have yet to figure out why they allow STOP THAT and Evil Kitty to pee in the house and not me. He's gettin better at goin to the door and goin potties outside, but I don't quite get the weird "happy dance" the beans do when he pees outside. When I pee outside, I get nuttin. He pees, and it's a frickin parade!

He's in puppy classes now. Maybe they'll teach him to bite the toys instead of me and to keep peeing outside.

So, that's where I've been. I better go now. The beast has awaken from his nap and that only means the Beans will take him outside and there goes another parade! Woo Hoo <sense my sarcasm, they've totally lost it!>

Thursday, June 21, 2012

They Call Him Bauer!

I call him "STOP THAT!!!!"

The beans have gone off the deep end! Just as I was kinda likin this only dog thing, they went and sprung up a surprise this week!

Can you believe this?!!! I was all sorts of likin this only dog thing. The personal walks with my stick. The special attenshuns. The extra special cuddles. And now they throw this guy at me?!

I will admit though....he is kinda cute. Isn't he?

I will give him that. But that's all he gets!

At first, I was really, really REALLY excited! A new brudda! A new playmate! A new sidekick to chase Ms Kitty and eat stuff with. I was a lil like this...
And somewhat like this...

But then, he started doing this stuff...

And some of this...

And he stole MY bed!!!!! That was totally uncool!!!

Boy oh boy, does he have a mouth!! They thought I was out for this dude.

And then there's this...

But, then he does more cute stuff and I forget about how much he screams in the crate and tries to bite my tummy! Them teefs are SHARP!! But that face is CUTE!

And even snuggles with me!!! Finally, someone to cuddle with!

Oh and he stoled Kitty's bed. He totally earned bonus points for that!!

Ok, I guess he can stay. But can someone send me some tylenol and ear plugs please?
I'm Beat!!!! And he's still going.....

Monday, June 11, 2012

Tell This Dog to Shut Up!

This is Kitty, or as I preferred to be called.... Ms. Kitty.

For those that don't know me, which I guess would be ALL of you because for some reason they gave this stupid dog the rights to write a blog and not me, I AM the Queen of this house!!!. Rubi, or "Queen Dumbass" as she calls herself, is obviously not that bright. She's a bit slow. She waits for me to toss food on the floor to her because she's too stupid to see she has a bowl full of her own noms in front of her. She barks at the wind, the rabits and when she toots. She eats my "litter box presents." And, well...she's really just a dumbass. We know that cats are way smarter than dogs. Well, she makes even Garfield look like a genius!

I thought I'd take a minute to say hello and to also ask if you have any idea where they sent that big doofy dog. Grady, I think was his name??? He was ok. He intimidated me but only because it was way obvious that he was much smarter than that other dumbass dog, so you never knew what he had up his paw. I only ask if you know where he is so that maybe I can send Rubi there? She needs to go!!! We got rid of one and if we can just toss her to the curb, I can finally have my house back.
I know he's gotta be out there, somewhere! Grady, come back!!! Let's boot this Dumbass together!!

On a serious note, I will say that I miss that smart dog. He listened when the "hooman beans" (will someone please tell the Dumbass that it's HUMAN BEANS?!?!) told him to stop chasing me. He would never get in my face and breathe his doo-doo breath on me like Rubi does.....everyday! He acted like he wanted to chase me sometimes, but he never did. He also would help me catch the flies that the Dumbass and the Beans would let in the house at night. I kinda miss that. I guess him and I could have really been a good team and maybe taught that "Dumbass" a thing or two. We all know that cats are the highest form of intellegent animals on the entire face of the earth. And with my book smarts, and Grady's street smarts...... we coulda sent Rubi out for cookies, locked the door behind her and waved as we snuggled up next to the HUMANS while she sniffed her butt on someone else's doorstep.
HaHa! Hi, stupid! You're out there! I'm in here! Neener Neener Neener!

Anyway, if any of you figure out where they sent that smart dog, please send me a personal note to:
Ms Kitty's Korner
c/o Queen Dumbass's blog cuz she won't know the difference anyway
PO Litter Box 2376
Meowville, State of Confusion, OU812

I'd really like to send this doe-doe bird there, so please....only those with true, real information respond. This is a matter of claiming back my territory which was mine waaaaayyyyy before that Rubi thingamajig came around.
This is MY house. Get out!
Kindest Regards,
QUEEN Ms Kitty

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

It's Like My Birthday....Only Not.

So, it's been over a week since Grady went bye-bye's. I still haven't figured out where he went exactly and am sometimes still sad he's not here for me to pick on, but I'm startin to get used to gettin all the attention to myself sometimes.

I went through a bit of a period of not really wanting to eat din-dins. I'd sniff, I'd nibble, I'd take it to the living room to see if it tasted any better, but it just wasn't the same as when Grady and I would eat together. It was always a contest for us to see who could finish their din-dins first and whoever won, got to lick the other doggies bowl. So, now that there's no contest, eating is kinda boring again. But, I'm gettin used to eatin on my own. Somedays, it's boring without him and other days I just gotta eat cuz I'm so hungry.

There are times where I'm kinda sad too. Sometimes, I lay on his bed and just smell him and sometimes I cry, but sometimes I remember the good times. That's when I get up and grab my toy and run through the house. He always looked at me funny when I did that. But sometimes, he'd join in and we'd chase each other around. So, when I grab my toys and play, I'm thinking of him.

And sometimes, I go to the toy basket and just look around to see if he'll come and tell me I can't play with it like he used to. But then again, having the toy baskets all to myself is pretty cool too!

But, I'm having lots of fun having lots of fun just hangin with the beans now. I get the bed to myself - well, I still have to share with the beans, but atleast Grady isn't hoggin them the whole time no more. I get the couch to myself - again, share with the beans, but with his big head out of the way, I have lots more space to snuggle with the beans. I get to pick any dog bed I want. I get all the window space too and get to guard the house by myself. I get to go to the doggie food store and smell the buffet and pick out toys. I go for walks now too - all by myself. I used to be scared to go unless Grady was with me, but the momma beans has been workin on building up my konfidents, err....confudence.....ugh....confidence, and I'm likin dis goin on walks stuff all by myself now too. Today, I even made a lil friend. A black doggie that barked waaaaaaaayyyyy more than I do came up to us and we played for a lil bit. That is, til his hooman beans came and got him. He was fun, I realized then that I do sometimes miss having a buddy.

One day, on our walk, the sun was making these weird beams and the lady bean and I stopped to take a look at it. It was kinda cool. Then, I felt like Grady was there on the walk with us. And now that I know he's with us when we go to walkies, I'm likin them even more.

Daddy bean brought home another lil friend for me too. He says he wants to put it in a tank, whatever that is, but the lady bean won't let him do that. So, then he said he'd build a pond and the lady bean said, "ok," but she don't believe him. So, we'll see what happens. She said he has to go back to his homes where he belongs. Til then, he in in a bucket with some water. I go to check on him when we go for walks, but I'm not allowed to play with him too much. He's cute tho.

This is where Grady sleeps now. It's a weird box and smells kinda funny, but sometimes at night, I go out to the living room and look at it and bark to tell him good night. He doesn't bark back, but I still think he hears me and tells me "good night" too.

The really neat thing though that since Grady's been gone, is that we gets lots of birthday presents!! But, the thing is, it's not my birthday! (but, I'm not telling anyone, so shhhhh!!!) No idea why these people send me birthday pressies, but I know it has really made the hooman beans happy sometimes and sometimes very sad.  But, they say even tho it's not my birthday and sometimes these pressies make them happy and sad at the same time, that they appreciate it more than anyone would know. They said it's not Grady's birthday either, but it's because everyone loved Grady so much (again, really?!!!) and shows how much other people are missins him too.

We gets:


And foods:

And more foods: This stuffs is so yummy!!!! I like froot!

Lots and lots of special cards and notes!!

And these things that the beans called "donayshuns" in Grady's memory. They were made to the National Canine Cancer Society and is supposed to help resurch for the stuff that made Grady's shoulder hurt. That was really cool.

And someone had this picture done of Grady. It really made the lady bean very sad and she looked at it for a very long time, just crying. I tried to make her feel better and licked away her tears, like Grady told me to do. This picture is now hanging on our wall by our front door. The beans said they missed seeing Grady's face when they came home and now they can see him everyday. I stop and stare at it sometimes too.

And another special gift. A beautiful necklace with Grady's name on it, his angel wings and a nice message that he'll always be remembered.

The beans wanted me to tell everyone who has sent cards, letter, messages, and gifts that they are so very much thank yous for everything! It means alot to all of us that our friends miss Grady as much as we do. I guess that's ok.....but they must not know that he really was a Sissy LaLa and even now that he's gone.....he's still gettin all the attenshun!

But still, the beans says Thank You Everyone! Their hearts have been touched and well, I'm surprised you guys fell for his Sissy LaLa-ness.

(ok, fine....I still miss him too!)