Tuesday, June 5, 2012

It's Like My Birthday....Only Not.

So, it's been over a week since Grady went bye-bye's. I still haven't figured out where he went exactly and am sometimes still sad he's not here for me to pick on, but I'm startin to get used to gettin all the attention to myself sometimes.

I went through a bit of a period of not really wanting to eat din-dins. I'd sniff, I'd nibble, I'd take it to the living room to see if it tasted any better, but it just wasn't the same as when Grady and I would eat together. It was always a contest for us to see who could finish their din-dins first and whoever won, got to lick the other doggies bowl. So, now that there's no contest, eating is kinda boring again. But, I'm gettin used to eatin on my own. Somedays, it's boring without him and other days I just gotta eat cuz I'm so hungry.

There are times where I'm kinda sad too. Sometimes, I lay on his bed and just smell him and sometimes I cry, but sometimes I remember the good times. That's when I get up and grab my toy and run through the house. He always looked at me funny when I did that. But sometimes, he'd join in and we'd chase each other around. So, when I grab my toys and play, I'm thinking of him.

And sometimes, I go to the toy basket and just look around to see if he'll come and tell me I can't play with it like he used to. But then again, having the toy baskets all to myself is pretty cool too!

But, I'm having lots of fun having lots of fun just hangin with the beans now. I get the bed to myself - well, I still have to share with the beans, but atleast Grady isn't hoggin them the whole time no more. I get the couch to myself - again, share with the beans, but with his big head out of the way, I have lots more space to snuggle with the beans. I get to pick any dog bed I want. I get all the window space too and get to guard the house by myself. I get to go to the doggie food store and smell the buffet and pick out toys. I go for walks now too - all by myself. I used to be scared to go unless Grady was with me, but the momma beans has been workin on building up my konfidents, err....confudence.....ugh....confidence, and I'm likin dis goin on walks stuff all by myself now too. Today, I even made a lil friend. A black doggie that barked waaaaaaaayyyyy more than I do came up to us and we played for a lil bit. That is, til his hooman beans came and got him. He was fun, I realized then that I do sometimes miss having a buddy.

One day, on our walk, the sun was making these weird beams and the lady bean and I stopped to take a look at it. It was kinda cool. Then, I felt like Grady was there on the walk with us. And now that I know he's with us when we go to walkies, I'm likin them even more.

Daddy bean brought home another lil friend for me too. He says he wants to put it in a tank, whatever that is, but the lady bean won't let him do that. So, then he said he'd build a pond and the lady bean said, "ok," but she don't believe him. So, we'll see what happens. She said he has to go back to his homes where he belongs. Til then, he in in a bucket with some water. I go to check on him when we go for walks, but I'm not allowed to play with him too much. He's cute tho.

This is where Grady sleeps now. It's a weird box and smells kinda funny, but sometimes at night, I go out to the living room and look at it and bark to tell him good night. He doesn't bark back, but I still think he hears me and tells me "good night" too.

The really neat thing though that since Grady's been gone, is that we gets lots of birthday presents!! But, the thing is, it's not my birthday! (but, I'm not telling anyone, so shhhhh!!!) No idea why these people send me birthday pressies, but I know it has really made the hooman beans happy sometimes and sometimes very sad.  But, they say even tho it's not my birthday and sometimes these pressies make them happy and sad at the same time, that they appreciate it more than anyone would know. They said it's not Grady's birthday either, but it's because everyone loved Grady so much (again, really?!!!) and shows how much other people are missins him too.

We gets:


And foods:

And more foods: This stuffs is so yummy!!!! I like froot!

Lots and lots of special cards and notes!!

And these things that the beans called "donayshuns" in Grady's memory. They were made to the National Canine Cancer Society and is supposed to help resurch for the stuff that made Grady's shoulder hurt. That was really cool.

And someone had this picture done of Grady. It really made the lady bean very sad and she looked at it for a very long time, just crying. I tried to make her feel better and licked away her tears, like Grady told me to do. This picture is now hanging on our wall by our front door. The beans said they missed seeing Grady's face when they came home and now they can see him everyday. I stop and stare at it sometimes too.

And another special gift. A beautiful necklace with Grady's name on it, his angel wings and a nice message that he'll always be remembered.

The beans wanted me to tell everyone who has sent cards, letter, messages, and gifts that they are so very much thank yous for everything! It means alot to all of us that our friends miss Grady as much as we do. I guess that's ok.....but they must not know that he really was a Sissy LaLa and even now that he's gone.....he's still gettin all the attenshun!

But still, the beans says Thank You Everyone! Their hearts have been touched and well, I'm surprised you guys fell for his Sissy LaLa-ness.

(ok, fine....I still miss him too!)

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